Author Archives: ostrichreport

• The Ostrich Report Is On Indefinite Hiatus

  Posted at 10:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 25, 2019

  

  I’ve started conducting interviews back in 2014 when I first joined Cracked’s Personal Experience team. Since then, I have talked with over 400 people and wrote nearly 100 articles about their mind-blowing experiences. The Ostrich Report was a place I created where I could post those interviews that were never published but which I felt needed to be shared with the world. And now that I’ve achieved what I set out to do, the site will be going on a prolonged, indefinite hiatus as I concentrate more on my other writing work.

  If you’ve been following The Ostrich Report, thank you so much for giving me your time and attention. If you’re just discovering the site now, there are 50 interview articles for you to go through and learn that all of us have unbelievable stories to tell. It was my pleasure to bring you just a few dozen of them.

  Posted in Site News | 0 Comments

• The Ostrich Report On: Field Recordists

  Posted at 10:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 22, 2019

  

  Every time you hear a non-human sound in a movie, TV show, or a game, it might be the ghost of your grandfather trying to communicate with you from beyond the grave. Or, more likely, it might be the work of a field recordist. They are the people who go out of the studio to record natural sounds of streams, trees, animals, you name it. We never really think about them, but without field recordists, every piece of media you own would sound off and Michael Winslow would probably be a billionaire. I reached out to some of those sound specialists to learn more about their jobs, and this is what they told me: Continue reading →

  Posted in Nature, Technology | 0 Comments | Tagged audio, field recording, field recordist

• The Ostrich Report On: Working At A Dating Scam Site

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 20, 2019

  

  We like to believe that love can be found in any place and at any time because we are all romantics at heart. But we would also like that place to be the internet and that time to be right now because Netflix and Amazon have really spoiled us. That’s how dating/marriage scam sites are still in business. They are the places where lonely men set up profiles to meet international beautifies but usually get taken for large sums of money instead. “Maria” used to work for just such a service in Ukraine targeting American men, and this is what she told me about her job: Continue reading →

  Posted in Crime, Sex & Romance | 0 Comments | Tagged date site, scam

• The Ostrich Report On: Garbagemen

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 18, 2019

  

  Let’s be honest: no one grows up dreaming of becoming a trash collector, even though it’s one of the most important jobs of the modern world. Without garbagemen, all of our rubbish would start piling up until the point of no return because we sure as shit can’t be bothered to drive it to the dump ourselves. What if we got some of that leaky garbage water on us? So then, who exactly are the people willing to do the job and keep the planet from resembling a drunken night hookup between Mad Max and WALL-E? I was wondering that myself so I reached out to Steve, who now works as a general sanitation manager, to ask him about his job. This is what he told me: Continue reading →

  Posted in Business | 0 Comments | Tagged garbage, garbageman, garbagemen, trash

• The Ostrich Report On: Social Security Disability

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 15, 2019

  

  Social Security Disability Insurance operates on the idea that if a person or their family have contributed to the workforce and paid into Social Security, they should be able to receive money in the event of a medical condition preventing them from pursuing employment. You know, socialism. Instead of sticking a hook at the end of your mangled arm and going back to your gynecological practice, you can now live it up on Easy Street, all on the taxpayer’s dime. That’s what some TV pundits would have you believe. But in practice, getting SSD is an extremely complicated and long process. Rachel, an SSD examiner, and Manny, an SSD consultant, explain why:

  Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

  Posted in Health, Money | 0 Comments | Tagged insurance, social security, social security disability

• The Ostrich Report On: Lawns

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 13, 2019

  

  A luscious, green lawn is more than just a plant-carpet in front of your house. It’s basically the very essence of America and all that it stands for. Sadly, it turns out that lawns are also wasteful, dangerous, and they bring out the crazy in people which… OK, granted, are also the very essences of America. But more importantly, they’re things that I learned from Pete, a lawncare specialist from Colorado, and Dr. Smith, a professor of turfgrass science. Specifically, they told me that… Continue reading →

  Posted in History, Science | 0 Comments | Tagged lawn, lawncare

• The Ostrich Report On: Attending A Hardcore Christian University

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 11, 2019

  

  Anyone who’s ever claimed that universities are the bastions of liberalism and left-wing thought has clearly never dealt with a school loan officer. Or heard about evangelical Christian universities. You know about them, right? They’re those private institutions with strict dress-codes, regressive ideas about sexuality, and “science” courses that are divided into Old and New Testament. Well, that’s what we all think but is that the reality? I was wondering about that so I talked to Michael who attended a hardcore Christian university, and this is what he told me:

  Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

  Posted in Politics, Religion | 0 Comments | Tagged christian university

• The Ostrich Report On: Polyamory

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 8, 2019

  

  Is it possible to love more than one person at a time? And before you start sending me porn links, let me clarify that I’m not talking about sex. I mean really caring for and being in a deeply-committed relationship with a person… while simultaneously doing the same thing with someone else, all with everyone’s knowledge and consent. A lot of people think it’s possible. It’s called polyamory, and it’s getting more and more popular around the world. I wanted to learn more about it so I reached out to a group of people in long-term polyamorous relationships. This is what they told me: Continue reading →

  Posted in Family, Sex & Romance | 0 Comments | Tagged polyamorous, polyamory

• The Ostrich Report On: BDSM Injuries

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 6, 2019

  

  Variety is the spice of life and sometimes that spice is hot sauce that you don’t want to quit because it hurts oh so nice. That’s just a clunky allegory (obviously written while hungry) for BDSM which, while fun if done correctly, always has the potential of going wrong and burning you. The thing is, though, people really don’t understand how BDSM injuries actually work, and I very much include myself in that group. That’s why I talked to veteran BDSM enthusiast Arya and Dr. Julie Fennell, a BDSM expert and associate professor at Gallaudet University, who told me that, on the whole, BDSM really just isn’t that dangerous. Details below: Continue reading →

  Posted in Sex & Romance | 0 Comments | Tagged bdsm, bdsm injuries

• The Ostrich Report On: Human Trafficking

  Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 4, 2019

  

  Anyone who says crime doesn’t pay clearly hasn’t read the International Labour Office’s report on human trafficking, which estimates that forced labor alone generates about $150 billion a year. And that’s just one aspect of buying and selling humans. The problem is actually much bigger and complicated than most of us realize because we don’t like thinking about how slavery never really ended. It just got smarter and quieter. I wanted to learn more about it all, so I talked to Dr. Whipple, a pediatrician who often works with victims of human/sex trafficking, Dr. Williamson, a University of Toledo professor and human trafficking expert, and Dr. Gates, who co-chairs the Research and Data Committee of the San Diego County Advisory Council on Human Trafficking. This is what I’ve learned: Continue reading →

  Posted in Crime | 0 Comments | Tagged human trafficking

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