Ostrich Report
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  • Category: Money

    • The Ostrich Report On: Social Security Disability

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on March 15, 2019

      Social Security Disability Insurance operates on the idea that if a person or their family have contributed to the workforce and paid into Social Security, they should be able to receive money in the event of a medical condition preventing them from pursuing employment. You know, socialism. Instead of sticking a hook at the end of your mangled arm and going back to your gynecological practice, you can now live it up on Easy Street, all on the taxpayer’s dime. That’s what some TV pundits would have you believe. But in practice, getting SSD is an extremely complicated and long process. Rachel, an SSD examiner, and Manny, an SSD consultant, explain why:

      Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

      Posted in Health, Money | 0 Comments | Tagged insurance, social security, social security disability
    • The Ostrich Report On: New Age Stores

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on February 15, 2019

      New Age stores are one of the great success stories of the modern age. When the people behind them looked at the world, they saw an untapped market for crystals that can realign your vagina’s moon charts and herbal tarot cards for dogs. Then they looked at it like six more times to make sure that their eyes were working right, and after that they went to work to fill that market need. Since then, New Age stores have popped up all over the world, and eventually Craig managed to land a job at a one in Birmingham, England, where he learned that…

      Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

      Posted in Health, Money, Religion, Science | 0 Comments | Tagged new age, new age store
    • The Ostrich Report On: Driving A Small-Town Taxi

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on February 8, 2019

      Much like dating and porn, you don’t really think about taxis in rural parts of the U.S. because you just naturally assume that all those things are done by horses. But believe it or not, people living somewhere between Los Angeles and New York have actually mastered fire and routinely use it to explode liquid dinosaurs that power their steel horseless carriages. Some even make a career of it, like Allen, who drives a taxi in eastern Montana, which is wholly different than driving a cab in the big city. How so? This so:

      Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

      Posted in Money, Travel & Leisure | 0 Comments | Tagged small town, taxi
    • The Ostrich Report On: Phone Auctions

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on February 6, 2019

      The past is some whack shit. It has asbestos, Taco Bell’s Waffle Tacos, and analog eBay. That last one is what we used to call auction houses in the beforetimes (which was weird cause everyone was like “what the hell is eBay?”) In any case, those places are still around and primarily servicing rich people, like the auction house out of Pennsylvania where Dave works, with phone bidding being part of his duties. This is what his job has taught him:

      Research by Evan Symon. Continue reading →

      Posted in Money | 0 Comments | Tagged auction
    • The Ostrich Report On: Junkyards

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on December 14, 2018

      One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. That’s not only a horrible way to tell your kids they’re adopted, but also a pretty succinct summary of the junkyard business. Need a cheap headlight for your POS clunker or a replacement intake carburetor… cylinder or whatever for that discontinued car your dad bought you for graduation? The junkyard’s probably cut them out of a trashed car months ago and have them stored away in their warehouse. I wanted to learn more about a business that turns garbage into dreams so I talked to Luke who works at a salvage yard in Texas. He told me that: Continue reading →

      Posted in Crime, Money, Technology | 1 Comment | Tagged junkyard, scrapyard
    • The Ostrich Report On: Being A Drug Deliveryman

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on December 3, 2018

      It’s easy to tell people to “just say no to drugs” but if you’re having full-on conversations with your narcotics, it might already be too late for you. It might also mean that, in your indisposed state, you’ve made use in the past of drug deliverymen, i.e. people who deliver illegal substances directly to your door and indirectly to your nose and/or veins. I recently talked to Malachi who used to deliver cocaine, MDMA, and ketamine, to learn what it was like working for the Mirror Universe version of Grubhub, and he told me that… Continue reading →

      Posted in Crime, Money | 0 Comments | Tagged drug deliveryman, drugs
    • The Ostrich Report On: Casinos

      Posted at 1:00 pm by ostrichreport, on November 23, 2018

      Casinos are a weird place. They make billions of dollars by convincing you to bet your life savings on a roll of a 1,000-side dice where only one space doesn’t have a picture of you bent over the table, having horrible things done to your lower half. And yet, people keep doing it and coming back for more, and, bizarrely, things get even bleaker when you look behind the scenes of a casino, which is what I did. I spoke to Laurie, Chris, and Sean, three ex-casino employees who told me that… Continue reading →

      Posted in Money | 0 Comments | Tagged abuse, casino, gambling, theft
    • The Ostrich Report On: Working For Crazy, Crazy-Rich People

      Posted at 4:34 am by ostrichreport, on November 12, 2018

      Rich people. They’re just like us, only they’ve never had to wonder how anything tastes like, and yes, of course that also includes human flesh, let’s be real here. So not like us at all now that I think about it, which Judy and Daniel would know all about having worked for a bunch of crazy rich people in the past, some of whom could’ve been Asian, I guess. In any case, this is what they’ve learned from their jobs: Continue reading →

      Posted in Money | 0 Comments | Tagged 1%, bank, millionaire, Money, rich
    • Recent Posts

      • The Ostrich Report Is On Indefinite Hiatus
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      • The Ostrich Report On: Working At A Dating Scam Site
      • The Ostrich Report On: Garbagemen
      • The Ostrich Report On: Social Security Disability
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